Back by popular demand, our DCS rankings from our Dodgeball Experts (I use that term loosely here).
Also, stick around for the EPIC FINALS REMATCH at 9pm, featuring #1 New Directions vs. #2 Sharktopus. It’ll be almost as good as my awesome dodgeball outfit.
HUMAN POLL RESULTS:
1. Sharktopus- Reclaims top spot going into a showdown of 1v2. Sharktopus plushes seem to be doubling every week, coincidence with the rise in rankings?
1. NewDirections – Nearly had an epic meltdown with a near loss. Superman may have found it’s Kryptonite.
3. Inappropriate Behavior - Team will go far in 2 ref system, finals may pose a problem with 4 people watching…
4.Crocomonkeys – 2 brainfarts changes a victory to a solid defeat.
5. The Mighty Duckers - Kyle starts to appreciate refs after standing in their shoes…could this be a new no arguing MD team we will see? Stay tuned…
6. Cool Kids – blows a 4-2 lead against top ranked New D, was so close to the upset of the year!
7.America’s Got Balls – Talent is better than their record, tonight’s performance will confirm it.
8.Restricted Balls – Looked REALLY shaky using their actual line-up. Anything short of domination tonight and they will fall down this board.
9. Balls of Fury – A case of jeckyl and hyde, which team is showing up this week?
10. Fishin a Barrell – And they gave Perkis their first win…
11. Scared Hitless – Are they finally living up to their potential? Maybe it just took a ball to the face to wake this team up
12.Incredi-Balls – If this was based on most fun team and attendance at Throwbacks, this team wins hands downs
13. Menace to Sobriety – All the talent, and no excecution…I blame the coach
14. Perkis Power – Are they tanking this season on purpose? Just barely squeezed by a Chin-less Fish
15. Honky Tonk Badonkadonk – Christina Gonzalez, you are more than welcome to join my team anytime!
16. Loftin Balls – The only winless team look to stay perfect tonight as they face a competitive team coming off their 1st loss. One thing they got going is fantasy dodgeball favors them…
17. Black and Blue Ballers – They have the right strategy, if only they can locate some execution
18. Great Balls of China – Ever watch Last Samurai? Think last scene vs Western weaponry, but they do it with a smile. Which is why I love this team!
1.Sharktopus – Remember when they were down 0-4 in the Finals to New Directions, only to come back and win 5 straight to win the Championship?
2. New Directions – Remember when they were up 4-0 in the Finals to Sharktopus (Vocal Adrenaline back then), only to blow 5 straight games and lose the Championship?
3. The Mighty Duckers – Yes, I am ranking them this high. After a weekend where Wade and Kyle played with Sa’s Rubber Duckies, they now have what it takes to beat Justin and friends.
4. Inappropriate Behavior – Already waiting to destroy Sharktopus next week after I ranked them below the Duckies.
5. Crocomonkies – The secret to beating them in the dead man game: Let David Tran catch your ball. Though that means his entire team comes back in, he’ll let you cleanly hit him in the foot right after.
6. America’s Got Balls – Team is finally hitting their stride after a rough start. They just need Wayne Jabberwockie to stop slacking off and pad my fantasy stats.
7. Cool Kids – I’m still upset they blew the chance to have an epic upset. What part of “don’t give up a catch” do you not understand?
8. Balls of Fury – Amanda Fenner will all of a sudden kick a ton of ass this week, as part of her “Revenge for Dropping Me in Fantasy” Tour. Glenn Tibay will be a new man now that he has enlisted a new throwing coach.
9. Scared Hitless – The Black Matrix is finally starting to accept his role as the Chosen One. Unfortunately he is following in the footsteps of the wrong Chosen One. Instead of rising to the occassion like Neo, he is blowing it like Lebron James. “What should I do?” How about catching a ball for once.
10. Incredi-Balls – Holy hell. Have you heard the girls talk in this game? I thought I was inside an Irish pub.
11. Menace To Sobriety – Home Depot is having an awesome sale this Friday. Doors open at 6am. Special discount on shovels for the grave I’m digging myself right now.
12. Fish In A Barrel – With Chin back and Glenn with a new throwing coach and Ashley and Shannon looking hot as ever, look for the team to make a strong push heading into the playoffs.
13. Honkey Tonk Badonkadonk – When all of their real players show up, they’re not half bad. Well, they’re not half good either.
14. Great Balls of China – Any team featuring the Last Samurai always has a chance. So did Lloyd Christmas.
15. Perkis Power – Has won the team award for the “WTF happened to this team” category.
16. Restricted Balls – Sorry, I have yet to really see this team play with only their original roster. All these damn D1 level subs have tainted their record.
17. Black and Blue Ballers – Needs to learn from Restricted Balls and pick up better subs for their games.
18. Loftin’ Balls – In the spirit of the holidays, I will refrain from saying what’s really on my mind.
1. New Directions – Only because Sharktopus isn’t a bunch of jerks that will murder their opponent in 30 minutes flat. It’s impossible for Sharktopus to have a 40 – 5 record. We care about the emotional well being of others.
2. Sharktopus – They’ll be number one again after they defeat New Directions in Playoffs again. And everyone will be rooting for Sharktopus again.
3. Inappropriate Behavior – After Crocomonkeys shakey performance against America’s Got Balls, this is perfect.
4. Restricted Balls – This isn’t just a dream folks. Restricted Balls is kicking ass and doing it with style. Since they havea very favorable schedule for the last two weeks, I’m pretty confident they will take this slot going into playoffs.
5. Crocomonkeys – What happened to our favorite man eating poo flingers? Could it be the star quarterback from former BallsIn Your Face can’t hack it in the big leagues and is screwing it up for everyone?
6. Mighty Duckers – Their revamped roster has proven excellent and well rounded. And who doesn’t love “Quack! Quack! Quack! QUACK! QUACK! QUACK!”???
7. Cool Kids – They’ve been doing great, holding their own and they have a nice easy ride to wrap up the regular season.
8. Balls of Fury – Finally starting to get it together, right when they need it most. With two ESPN worthy matches coming up, they’ll put on a show for their biggest fans.
9. Scared Hitless – A good record (and The Chosen One) keeps them in the top 10, two rough match-ups to close out the regular season will be a true test of their new skill (The Black Matrix).
10. America’s Got Balls – Yes they do. And they know how to use them. Congratulations to AGB, you get my vote for one of the most improved teams from last season. Mud who?
11. Incredi – BALLS – The girls on this team are all Sandra D summer lovin’ at the bar, but watch out on the court, fingers and f-bombs go flying all over.
12. Fish in a Barrel – Has some talent and an easy schedule, the only question is, who’s gonna show up?
13. Honky Tonk Badonkadonk – Will get murdered this week, especially if team Captain Jeff Bourgeois decides not to show up again without notice.
14. Perkis Power – Only because they’re a returning team, which obviously didn’t mean much in terms of improvement.
15. Menace to Sobriety – They have a -15 Game Differential, but at least they have 3 Ws under their belt.
16. Great Balls Of China – Have Michael Feathers, so they have a chance not to finish last.
17. Loftin’ Balls – You’re only here because GBoC has Michael Feathers and B&BBs has a suicidal last two rounds.
18. Black & Blue Ballers – Really guys, I cry for you a little bit at night when I see your final match-ups.